“Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, once again we would like to apologise for the delay to our flight BA663 to London Heathrow Airport. We will now begin by boarding all those who require special assistance such as those in wheelchairs and with small infants and shortly after that, business class and Gold Card members, followed by the rest of the passengers. Thank you.”

And thus began a parade of 12 wheelchairs carrying an assortment of old, infirm and broken legged passengers who were looked upon with envy by the other 150 or so passengers who were fed up to the back teeth for having to arrive 1 to 2 hours before the flight scheduled departure, only to be informed the flight would be 90 minutes late taking off.

Amongst the 12 wheelchair passengers was a large man in a T shirt, a pair of trousers, which looked like pyjama bottoms to me but I cant be sure, and a pair of slippers that seemed 4 sizes too big, even for a big man like him; they must have been made for Big Foot himself.

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome to Heathrow Airport where the time is now approaching 11:30 pm and the outside temperature is 8 degrees Celsius. We ask our passengers requiring special assistance such as wheelchairs to remain seated until all other passengers have left the aircraft.”

I was the first to leave the aircraft this time and I am no slouch when it comes to quick exit out of aircrafts and to passport control desks. As I left the jetty and entered Terminal 5 proper, to my astonishment, I was overtaken by our friend with the pyjama bottoms and Big Foot slippers who must have had a miraculous recovery during the 5-hour flight, and judging by the speed of his walk, he looked ready to have a go at the 800 meter event at the next Olympics.

To add to my overall annoyance about being late and tired, when we reached the carousel to collect our luggage, the lazy, cheating, lying, scruffy Olympiad had his suitcase emerge first so he was able to shuffle off ahead of the old, infirm, privileged club members and the fit.

Airlines and airports check your identity multiple times, question your visa, X-Ray your luggage, get you to strip half naked and still suspect you are up to something sinister.  However, they never question your claim to infirmity when it comes to wheelchair requests.  In my own experience, this is the second time I come across someone who abuses the wheelchair facility.  It must be common practice for low life characters such as this parasite.